Joyful Bits

It's The Simple Things In Life That Helps With My Anxiety

It's the simple things in my life that help me balance happiness and borderline anxiety. Anxiety in adults is one of those things most older people like myself never want to talk about because when you get past 40, you supposed to have everything in life together. That is the biggest misconception about getting older, is life should be a fairy tale walk in the park. The fact is the "fairy tale" part is not real life, although I wish it were  
But, what I find so fascinating about my life is I can re-direct the way I feel by looking and addressing the simple things in my everyday lifestyle. Anxiety affects so many people in the world, and I do not take it lightly, this is my journey without any medical advice, just woman to woman love because you are not alone.

Five mornings ago, I woke up feeling sweaty, anxious, and I could not sleep. I can not explain why I have episodes like this sometimes. But, I have dealt with it as a child, and it has carried on into my late adulthood. Over the past 15 years, it has gotten better. When I was younger, I would experience anxiety so bad until I would have breakouts that consist of hives all over my face, back, and legs. I am thankful after years of seeing a Dr. and trying different things without using the medicine, I can control it. One of my treats would be to slow down and breathe for 15 to 20 minutes. Most days, I would meditate on good things, block out anything thing that made me sad, angry, or overly anxious. 

Yes, sometimes I would swell if I got happy about something, its weird anxiety attacks can be triggered by anything, and I mean anything.
 I  decided to get up, make myself some tea, and close my eyes so I can pray and meditate for 15 minutes. I spent another 30 minutes of reading and making notes in my new journal. 
I found keeping a journal is one way for me to relax and release unnecessary anxiety hormones. Also, getting up before everyone else in the house helps me a lot. Praying and meditating all help when I make a conscious decision to do it quickly and swiftly.
For the most part, I stay away from idle time thinking about nothing.  In other words, I try not to allow my thoughts to be on things that will drain me. Believe it or not, I am an over-thinker I overthink everything in my life.  It is so funny because I know I do that, but I can't stop it. I have just found ways to keep myself in check.  

While my family was still asleep, I knew I wanted a little fresh air and breakfast by myself. So, I darted straight out to grab an acai bowl from my local juice bar. I have discovered over the years I need my alone time and I need some fresh air to do absolutely nothing but walk around if I want too. 

 I decided to go to the outside plant market, and it was so much fun and relaxing for me. Of course, I walked around before I bought myself some farm eggs, candy, and a cactus plant.  I may never be able to explain my feelings to no one, not even the ones who are very close to me. 
But, thankfully, I have a loving family who understands and allows me to have my own personal alone time by myself.

 I spent hours at the market, and I found the tiniest cactus tucked away in a corner, I knew it was for me. So, I walked around a little bit more until I found the cutest spot to place my plant into.

 I spent another hour talking to the nursery manager, we laughed and talked about getting older and what we must do as women to stay healthy and happy. No kidding our conversation was so enjoyable, and we connected in so many ways. She shared with me the number one reason why she opened her own private plant market.  It was because it gave her something to do with her life besides being a mom and wife. Now it's a family business run with two her daughters and husband.
 After getting my plant and groceries, I walked away feeling refreshed and ready to enjoy the rest of my day.  All I needed was a little fresh air and a few moments to relax.

By the time I made it back home, everyone was up, and I felt right at home with all the noise of yelling mama, where have you been?  Did you bring me anything?
Yep, the sound of noise made me feel alive and happy and to be honest, that is what is essential at this moment in time. (Laughter, Peace, Joy, and Happiness)
Of course, Moriah and the other girls thought this cactus was for them. Nonetheless, we named her  Olivia. 

The older I become I need to find ways to enjoy and balance the simple things in my life.  Life is worth living :) and I want to be here on earth for a long time with my family and talking with you guys.
                                                     How do you find balance in your life?

Side Note: It is ok for you to breathe and put yourself first.....(repeat after me) It is ok for me to breathe and put myself first :)